I have a plan (can you believe it?)
When I was working in film I really thought that I was getting better at drawing. I was painting every day - so I should be a master when I decided to leave. Right?
But I was drawing very specific things - and largely it was grunt work for the real artists. Don’t get me wrong, it was a great job and I worked with some of the most amazing artists I’ve ever met. If my health had permitted I could have been somewhat of a good scenic artist in 10 years time.
A scenic artist in film paints backdrops that are sometimes 200m long and 50m high, or they’re painting murals, detail work, anything complex. It’s an insanely technical job that requires a lot of kit and a lot of training. If a set was looking out onto a mountain range then a scenic would draw and paint that backdrop. Nowadays a lot of it is blue screen, but there are some directors that prefer to use us. And surprisingly we’re often cheaper. But you need to be able to draw things in perspective with exactly the right colour to go well with the set, lighting and on camera and for it to look real. And you have to be able to draw it in a week or two just by yourself with one other person (me). And as I said, these backdrops ain’t small. I became very used to heights painting 70m+ in the air on a scissor lift. There aren’t many of us left, for obvious reasons.
I was an assistant, I got to fill in places that the scenic told me, and sometimes I was allowed to paint fun stuff if it wasn’t too major.
When I came out of film however, I realised I could barely draw. I hadn’t drawn people or animals in ages (my favourite things), and I hadn’t really had the chance to figure out how to paint like a scenic. I had watched of course, but that’s a far cry from doing it yourself. I would try to go home and figure it out by myself, I even bought a massive canvas to try to do some samples on. But by then my health had really taken a turn and I was so exhausted after driving back from the studio that I just couldn’t face painting.
I realised that there wasn’t any room in my life anymore for the thing I loved most. Even more than that, there wasn’t any room in my life for the thing I’m actually good at.
I’ve always had a sneaking suspicion that I’m not actually very good at many things. I don’t suit a majority of work places, I’m not very good at admin because I find it so boring that I make loads of mistakes, and I’m not the most organised. I’m not very neat either so spaces that require me to be a fashionista don’t work out either. I’m not great with hierarchy - I can take orders and feedback no problem, but in spaces that require things like uniforms etc…. absolutely not.
So most normal jobs, 9-5 routines etc, just don’t have any appeal to me, and I don’t think I appeal to them.
The only time I've ever really been good at something has been drawing and painting. I’ve drawn since I was small and it’s always been something I’ve had a flair for. Don’t get me wrong, I routinely look at my own work these days and see the gaping hole of potential in it. But I’m also excited by that. I’m so damned excited to get better at it, and it’s just something that I’ve never had to work hard to be interested in.
I think the truth is I’m eternally irked by my own inadequacies in my art, but irked in a wonderful way. There’s always a ‘next time I’ll try this’.
So what is my plan? What is my method?
I’ve broken down my approach to ‘relearning’ or ‘training’ myself to be the best I can be.
I begins with ‘Line’, then it goes onto ‘Perspective’ then it goes onto ‘Light’ then it finishes on ‘Colour’.
These are the things I’m more interested in exploring and these are the things I want to master in my life’s work.
You might think that this seems so technical! And yes it is. I love the technical side and the aim is being able to draw whatever I want from my head with materials that I know exactly how to use.
Line - the line has to be controlled, beautiful, full of force and drama, but also impulsive, unusual, and graphic. For this I’m currently enrolled in Michael Mattesi’s ‘Drawing Force’ course. For anyone interested in capturing life and movement then this is the course for you! it’s difficult but it’s exactly what I want.
Perspective - This is where I am now - and I’m using the force drawing module to really nail it. Every morning I draw my primitives. For anyone who doesn’t know what they are, primitives are basic shapes (cube, cone, sphere, cylinder etc). and they are invaluable things to draw from every angle.
Light - This is where all the great comic book artists come in, Bernie Wrightson being one, Sergio Toppi being another. As well as painters such a Rembrandt, the master of light. Light and perspective are intertwined in a way, because light will delineate the 3D shape in space. But you need to know perspective to know light and you need to know line to know perspective.
Colour - finally my holy grail. I’m forever excited by colour and how it works. I got a taste of colour theory when I was a scenic assistant as I had to colour match and mix for the scenic. I was taught a little by Steve Mitchell - who by the way is possibly one of the greatest artists who ever lived and you won’t even know him because his artwork is the background that looks so real to you in the movies.
I’m so excited to get to this level, but I know it’s fairly far away. Every time I try to skip to the colour part, something doesn’t work and I am reminded of the need for patience. Patience. It is the virtue I am entirely without, and will also be one of my life’s work.
And so you see my method above. The schedule I am working on, and the things I intend to master. It’s long road, but the only one for me.